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Six tests, in the order they happen

Stages

A bag is examined six times between your bedroom and your hotel room, and each examiner asks a different question. Almost every claim on a luggage listing answers the first one. This is the other five, written out.

The route

  1. Stage 1
    Packing at Home

    How much it holds

  2. Stage 2
    The Front Door

    What it weighs when you pick it up

  3. Stage 3
    The Gate Sizer

    Whether the whole object fits a metal frame

  4. Stage 4
    The Overhead Bin

    Whether it shares a bin without a fight

  5. Stage 5
    The Baggage Belt

    What survives a chute, a stack and a belt

  6. Stage 6
    The Hotel Room

    Whether it opens flat in a small room

  1. Stage 1Packing at Home

    Packing at Home

    How much does it hold?

    The bedroom floor is the friendliest examiner a bag will meet. It is patient, it is horizontal, and it lets you take things out and start again. The question it asks is the simplest of the six: how much of this goes in.

    Listings say:Capacity in liters, sometimes. This is the one test listings compete on.

  2. Stage 2The Front Door

    The Front Door

    What does it weigh in your hand?

    You pick the bag up, and the whole question of the trip changes. On the floor it was a volume. In your hand it is a weight, and it will be a weight for every minute between here and the hotel room.

    Listings say:Nothing. Not one listing states an empty weight.

  3. Stage 3The Gate Sizer

    The Gate Sizer

    Does it go into the frame?

    The frame at the gate is a rectangular steel box, usually bolted to the floor, and it is the least negotiable examiner in the whole sequence. It asks one question. Does the object go in.

    Listings say:Three listings state a full size. Eight say approved of the bag itself.

  4. Stage 4The Overhead Bin

    The Overhead Bin

    Does it fit beside somebody else?

    The bin is the first test where the bag is not judged alone. It is judged against whatever is already in there, and against whatever arrives after it. The question stops being how big is this and becomes what shape is this, and will it give.

    Listings say:Twelve listings say whether the shell is rigid or soft. None say more.

  5. Stage 5The Baggage Belt

    The Baggage Belt

    Does it survive being thrown?

    Once a bag goes down the belt behind the check-in desk it stops being handled by anyone who knows what is in it. It is stacked, it goes down a chute, it is loaded by machine or by hand into a hold, and at the far end it comes around a carousel having been dropped at least once on the way.

    Listings say:Eight listings make a durability claim. None names a test method.

  6. Stage 6The Hotel Room

    The Hotel Room

    Does it open where you put it down?

    The final test is the quietest one and it happens with nobody watching. You are in a room, it is late, and there is a folding luggage rack against the wall that is shorter than your case. The question is whether the bag opens where you have put it down.

    Listings say:Nothing. No listing describes how the bag opens or how much floor it needs.